What are my partner’s birthing options?
When it comes to giving birth, there are several options available for your partner. The right choice is the one that your partner feels most comfortable with and her doctor or midwife believes is best for her and the baby.
- Hospital birth – The main benefit is that your partner will be in a place packed with expertise and facilities to assist with providing the safest delivery for your baby. You’ll have doctors and midwives on hand as well as specialist care, should your partner or infant need it. And she’ll most likely be surrounded by other new mums in the same situation, which can be a great comfort.
- Home birth – Many mums choose to give birth at home as it is a relaxed and familiar environment. You’ll need to make sure your partner’s midwife or doctor is happy with this option before deciding on it, as there are fewer pain relief options and if she needs emergency care she’ll need to be transferred to hospital.
- Water birth – Many women find this to be a more relaxing way for a baby to birth as they are born into an environment much like the one they’re used to in the womb. Water births may be possible at your hospital or you may even be able to hire a birth pool for giving birth at home.
As long as your partner’s pregnancy is running smoothly, she’s free to choose the birthing option she feels most comfortable with. And it’s not set in stone – there is room for her to change her mind later. Just make sure you completely understand what she wants and doesn’t want, as you may be asked about her wishes during labour or the birth, if your partner is otherwise too preoccupied!
What are the signs of labour?
Your partner will know she’s in labour if she starts to experience contractions. They may not be too intense at first but will get more frequent and more painful. She might describe it as a pain in her lower back that seems to spread round to the base of her bump.
Her waters may break (which can be a rush of fluid or a trickle) but every labour is different - her waters breaking doesn’t necessarily mean that your baby’s birth is going to happen straight away. Sometimes this might not happen until much later on in the labour.
If your partner thinks she’s going into labour then you should call the midwife or doctor. It’s a good idea for you to have the midwife’s or doctor’s phone numbers as well as other important numbers too, in case you have to make the call by yourself.
Unless you have a home birth planned, the midwife or doctor will tell her when to go into hospital. Even if you’re not 100% sure whether your partner is in labour or not, it’s worth getting it checked out – just be prepared to be sent home again!
Preparing for a hospital birth
If your partner is planning a hospital birth, there are some really useful things you can do to help save you time and reduce stress on the big day:
- Practise driving to the hospital using different routes, in case the best route is jammed.
- Time the journeys, so you know how long it’ll take to get there.
- Check you know where to park; if you’re using a pay car park, find out how much it costs and keep enough spare change in your car, so you’re not searching around at the last minute.
What your partner will need to take to the hospital
Your partner will probably have had her hospital bag packed before this but the last thing on her mind at this point will be remembering things to take, so it’s worth you checking that she has her bag with her, together with her birth plan if she’s written one, and her maternity notes.
What you should take to the hospital
With so much attention on packing your partner's bag, it's easy to forget you will need a few things too. So once you've checked her bag is ready to go, pack a separate one for yourself. Here are a few ideas of what to take:
- A change of clothes in case of a lengthy labour
- Swimming shorts if your partner’s planning a water birth
- Toothbrush, toothpaste and deodorant
- Some water and snacks
- Extra change for the car park or payphone
- Any prescription medicine you take regularly
- Camera/video with a fully charged (and a spare) battery
- Fully charged mobile phone, with a list of key numbers
- A watch to time contractions
- Something to fill in time for any long periods of waiting, like an MP3 player, a book or magazine
What happens when you arrive at the hospital
When you first get to hospital for the birth your partner will probably be taken to a room for mums-to-be who’ve just arrived. A health care professional will run through a series of checks and tests with her. It may be her own midwife or doctor who does this but it’s more likely to be who’s on duty at the time.
What happens next
If your partner is in early labour it may be better to take her home again and wait for the contractions to get stronger. If you stay, she’ll be given a bed on the ward and may move into a delivery room when her labour progresses.
If her contractions aren’t too strong this is when the midwife or doctor will go through her birth plan with her and find out what all her preferences are during labour. It’s important that you’re familiar with the birth plan too.
However, if she’s in full labour she'll be taken straight to a delivery room. Your partner will still be able to tell the midwife or doctor about her birth plan but if things are moving more quickly by this stage, you (or her birth partner if you are not planning to be in the delivery room) will need to step in. So make sure you know things like her preferred option for pain relief, what position she wants to give birth in, and whether she’d like skin-to-skin contact with your new baby afterwards.
What if she needs a caesarean?
There are times when doctors will advise her to have a caesarean section. Some women find out they need a caesarean section long before they give birth, but for others the decision might not be made until they go into labour. For more information on caesarean sections please speak to your health care professional.
It takes around six weeks to recover from a caesarean section, so your partner will need extra help at home so she can rest and concentrate on her own recovery as well as your beautiful new baby.