What to consider when choosing a birth partner
In most cases, the father of the baby will be the birth partner. But if that isn’t possible or you want additional support, you may choose to turn to a doula, close friend or relative who ideally has been through labour themselves.
Having a birth partner with you is really a very good idea. A birth partner is your eyes, ears and mouth during labour. Because they know you and your birth plan you can relax knowing that, wherever possible, your wishes will be followed. Having a birth partner encouraging you can be really helpful during childbirth, as studies have shown that mums who are less stressed are less likely to need a caesarean section or epidural.
Your birth partner should be someone you trust completely, and has the strength to help you through the demands of labour. They’ll need to be able to cope with seeing you in pain – so some understanding of what to expect is good for them too. It may be upsetting for them but they will need to remember always that they are there to make you feel better and nothing else!
Also, make sure your birth partner fully understands your birth plan and has the confidence to help you make different decisions if things don’t quite go to your original plan.
Being thick-skinned is a bonus too, because who knows what you might shout at them during labour! It’s also crucial that your birth partner can drop everything to be at your side for as long as you need them.
Preparing your birth partner for the birth
Because it’s such a big responsibility, it’s a good idea for your birth partner to be as prepared as you are for your baby’s delivery day. Here are a few things they can do:
- Attend antenatal classes with you
- Be totally familiar with your birth plan
- Learn how to massage your lower back
- Prepare some key praise and support phrases (that won’t annoy you!) to help you through